Today’s Find Your Flow message is something I’ve been sitting with for a while. It’s about that nagging feeling that you still have to prove something to yourself or others. 

Those places where you may still not feel good enough. Where you may still be silently hoping for some validation or encouragement that you’re doing something well. That feeling that something has to happen in order for you to settle even more deeply into yourself. That somehow you just need to be—more.

For most of my life — without fully realizing it — I was operating from this quiet belief that I had to earn my place. Often, that feeling came from having to do more. Having to keep up. I would make excuses when I’d rest, as if I didn’t really deserve to allow myself to slow down. 

That somehow the more I suffered, the more I could earn/deserve some good things to come my way. 

Like there was always one more thing I needed to do before I was truly allowed to feel worthy of it all.

And the tricky part?

I was achieving a lot. From the outside, things looked like they were going well. 

But on the inside there was always this voice that said — not yet… not quite… a little more first.

I think so many of us carry this.

It’s interesting to see where it comes from. Who are you trying to prove yourself to? For me, when I became a mother the expectations on me expanded and I felt sad about the distance that was created from a lot of meaningful people in my life. It made me work harder to prove I was enough. I chased support and validation in the wrong places. 

An old wound reappeared in this new season that hasn’t taken some work to separate from and heal. I was fighting to feel worthy from someone who was never going to see me the way I desired. That realization and desire to take personal accountability helped me grow a lot. 

Especially those of us who are high-achieving, deeply feeling and growth-oriented, we seem to hold a lot of personal responsibility to ‘fix it all’. That somehow focusing on your own stuff isn’t enough either. 

We’ve been conditioned — by the way we were raised, by the culture we grew up in — to believe that worthiness is something you arrive at…

After you’ve done enough.
Proven enough.
Become enough.

But I want to offer you something different today.

Worthiness is not a reward…
It is your starting point.

You were worthy before you achieved anything.

Before you healed your patterns, built your family or business or figured some of this life journey out.

Even the messy, reactive, struggling, successful, confused version of you is and was still enough. 

You were worthy then.
You are worthy now.

That hasn’t changed — and it never will.

The work isn’t to become worthy.
The work is to stop treating yourself like you aren’t.

And there’s something important to look at here…

When you believe you aren’t enough, it doesn’t just stay as a thought, it quietly shapes how you live.

It shows up in the way you overextend yourself…

Saying yes when you don’t actually have the capacity.

Giving more than feels good in an effort to feel valued.

It shows up in how you receive…
Do you hold onto wealth, or spend it to feel worthy?
Do you allow your flow and opportunities to come your way?
Do you deflect compliments?
Do you minimize your wins or even feel embarrassed like you have to explain them away?
Do you allow yourself to celebrate your achievements, or do you keep moving the bar? 

It can show up in your relationships if others are also struggling to feel worthy as well. Over-explaining. Over-proving. Shrinking to feel accepted. Putting others needs above your own. Explaining away and accepting poor behavior, and yet still making yourself overly available. 

And maybe most importantly — it disconnects you from your own presence and purpose.

Because when you’re constantly measuring yourself against “not enough,” you’re never actually here.

You’re always trying to become someone else.

Living in future time steals the present from you. 

If you look at where you spend time what percentage of time do you focus on your future? Trying to make it better at some later time? 

Do you focus on your past? If so, how often? What didn’t work or the perceived mistakes you’ve made? Or what went well, and how you’re using that to continue to build momentum? How hard are you on yourself? 

How often are you truly present? Here in your moment? 

So what does it look like to shift this — not perfectly, but intentionally?

Here’s a starting place:

1. Notice where you’re proving
Where are you over-efforting, over-explaining, or over-giving?
Just noticing begins to soften the pattern.

2. Practice receiving — without the “but”
The next time something meaningful comes your way… pause.
Let it land. No deflection. No minimizing. Just receive.

3. Give yourself what you’ve been postponing
Is there something you’ve been waiting to “earn”?
Rest, support, an experience, an ask for something you’d love to create or receive?
Experiment with allowing it now — even in small ways

4. Come back into your body
Allow yourself to identify and feel that feeling of ’not good enough’. It’s not everywhere. The more you can be in touch with it fully, the less control it has over you. Then feel where you are enough. Where you are certain. Where you experience purpose. Where you feel love and awe…Then move to your heart and Choose how you want to move forward. 

Your body brings you back to truth — through breath, being, awareness, acceptance, stillness and choice. 

I notice this most with my clients when they finally allow themselves to receive—something powerful shifts in how they feel about themselves. New habits, boundaries and a sense of self-love become easier. 

Notice the subtleties in your body. Notice where you jump into immediately deflecting, minimizing, or chasing something with a “but” as if you have to explain yourself. 

That pause.
That willingness to let it land.

That’s the practice.

You don’t have to keep proving yourself.
Not to anyone else.
And especially not to yourself.

You are allowed to want things — beautiful, big, meaningful things — simply because you’d love to create them. 

You’re allowed to choose your path. However simple or complex—it’s about what works for you, not what others think.

Because you matter.

So today, ask yourself: 

• Where are you still waiting to feel worthy?
• Is there anyone you still wish would just see or validate you? 
• What have you been putting off giving yourself until you’ve earned it?
• What would shift if you decided — right now, today — that you already are enough?

If you need any 1:1 or group support, feel free to reply. I’m here to be on your team.

You are worthy. Right now. As you are.

That has always been true.

With love,

Laurin