Today’s find your flow message is a bit personal. It’s about asking for help when we’re struggling, and being willing to receive the support that truly helps us step into our most trusting, vibrant, connected and abundant selves. 

I know for me I went through a pretty dark season postpartum. For a long time I held it all in. I pretended I was fine. I often even lied to myself that I was ok. Then when I finally realized it wasn’t working for me, I tried so hard to pull myself out of it. Most days I even had moments where I was thriving and back in my flow, but I couldn’t sustain it throughout the day. And, certainly not day-to-day without a lot of effo. 

My nervous system was a mess and I was often running on fumes. 

I was definitely not acting like the mother, friend and woman I wanted to be. 

It was time to take a deep look at myself and choose something new. 

I felt angry and overwhelmed. I started to believe I had no support and was feeling the lack in everything around me. 

I kept waiting to get through it. To reach the other side. To earn a moment of ease.

And then one afternoon, I just stopped. And I thought: why haven’t I asked anyone for help?

Not because there was no one to ask. But because I had this quiet, deeply ingrained belief that I was supposed to be able to handle it. That asking meant I wasn’t strong enough. That needing support was somehow a reflection of how far I still had to go. 

I think a lot of us carry this. Especially those of us who are natural givers. Who know how to hold space for others but struggle to let anyone hold it for us.

But here is what I have come to know: the inability to receive is its own kind of block. The truth is, I stopped seeing the support in the forms they were showing up in, and how that was actually helping me step into an even more fulfilling version of myself. And, I saw where I needed to stop trying so hard and turn elsewhere. 

I finally decided to be vulnerable and reach out for the support that I knew would gently hold me accountable while helping me move forward. 

My habits started changing, I prioritized my self-care, grounding in my body, settling my nervous system, surrounding myself with old friends that helped me feel safe and grow. 

Quickly the discipline to choose a new way of being became second nature again. 

There’s an old saying, “anything worth doing well, is worth doing poorly first.” 

Remember, this truly is a journey. And, receiving is not a weakness. It is actually a courageous act of self-love and self-worth. It says: I am worth being supported.

Often when I work with clients, in the beginning they believe if they have a down day or they feel off that they have somehow failed. The ebbs and flows are always a part of all of our journeys. The more consistent you become, the easier the challenges become as you hold a space of ease and curiosity rather than of disappointment and tension. 

That day I finally reached out — to friends, to past mentors who really saw me at my best, and I knew could handle me at my worst without judgment. When I did this I finally let go of holding it all together and something powerful started shifting. 

I was willing to share where I really was. I held up the mirror and admitted to myself what wasn’t serving me. 

I stopped crying for help to the people that couldn’t help me and kept judging me. They weren’t doing anything wrong, it truly was helping me to grow, but it took me some time to see and accept it. I kept wanting to be seen and validated along the way. 

Sometimes, you have to go first and choose yourself. To be willing to share all of yourself. 

The messy parts, and all the parts that still believe in you.

I know even in this place of lack, I truly believed so much more was possible. There was still sooo much more I wanted.

When I finally let myself be seen in safe and healing environments; I felt lighter. More connected. More like myself.

Not because they fixed anything. But because I stopped pretending I had to do it all myself. Because I started reminding myself who I really am. Because I remembered to use all the tools I’ve spent almost two decades refining. 

I want this for you too if you’re going through a challenging season.

So, I’m asking you today—as a coach and as someone who has been there:

What have you been carrying alone that you don’t have to?

Who in your life would genuinely want to, and be able to, support you if you let them?

What would it feel like — really feel like — to finally choose yourself?

If you need any 1:1 or group support, feel free to reply and I’m here to be on your team.

You’ve got this and you are enough regardless of what this season brings. 

With love,

Laurin