Today’s find your flow message is geared towards building your awareness and certainty in your choices. 

Have you made a choice and wish you hadn’t, or tried really hard to blame others for how things turned out? Or, made a choice that actually felt clear for you, but then surprised yourself when you felt grief and guilt? 

It can be challenging to truly own your choices. 

There are times where you’re probably just moving so quickly that you just rush into a yes or no without taking the time to tune in. 

Then, there are other times when you actually do tune in or gain your clarity—and yet, you still choose something that goes against it. Those are the times it’s really easy to want to blame others for how things turn out. 

Both are signals to pay attention, slow down, get centered and connect to and choose your choices.
Wherever you are in this season of your life–own it. 

It’s not so much about what you choose to do, as much as the how you choose to engage.

Can you dedicate time to Own Your Choices?

If an action is on the way to something on your highest values—link it with what you’re most inspired by until you fill up with ease and gratitude for what’s in front of you. You can ask yourself: “How specifically will this action of x help me fulfill my highest value of y.”

If you can live more consistently aligned with your current values—with the ability to delegate and not sacrifice other areas of your life—embrace that. Either way—you’re making choices that empower you vs drain you.  

For example, my values since having my daughter have shifted. My daughter has taken the place of most of my creativity, inspiration, love and dedication that used to be more geared towards learning, teaching and client work. While I’d love to solely focus on her at times, doing that all the time (with where I am at) doesn’t fulfill my long-term vision or the most inspiring way I can show up for her. 

When I solely focus on her, I feel the friction of other areas of my life. Since, I still want to raise the actions of things lower on my values—I have to consciously and consistently link my dedicated tasks so that I can feel fulfilled and grateful. 

When I don’t link my actions and take time to focus on lower but necessary priorities I feel drained, frustrated and out of alignment. It’s such a small but insanely meaningful shift to help you feel empowered in your choices.

Another way of owning your choices is choosing whom you share certain information with and when. 

If you’re like me sometimes you may jump to overshare and desire validation and support only to be met with judgment, criticism and doubt. It can be easy to match someone’s doubt and feel defeated, filled with questions or thrown off-track after sharing. 

This is a different kind of friction that requires a new skill set of separating energetically, owning your space and unique way of being. It also asks you to pause and be discerning at times. I like to do this from my knowing, more than from my head or not feeling good enough in my 3rd chakra or off in my 2nd and wanting emotional stability or validation. 

For example, when the creation of my daughter came in with such a strong clarity and knowing it was so effortless. And, yet I knew I didn’t want to overshare this moment. I selectively and slowly chose how to share that I was pregnant and the story of her creation. It was such a sacred space that I wanted to protect it until I felt ready and this was an experience of really owning my truth and my timing doing it completely my way without getting swayed. 

As I slowly shared with family I was met with many requests and desires to share the news more quickly with everyone that I had to truly tune into and choose what was best for me and my daughter. 

I have also experienced the contrast of giving up control and saying yes against my better intuition when it came to caregivers early on that also had strong certainty about how I should feed or put my daughter to sleep. 

This time I was a bit more uncertain with a newborn so eventually I started relaxing on things that mattered to me until I got so sick and such clear feedback I had to bring my awareness back to what I know. I was so grateful I stuck with nursing against their “better” judgment and that now at 2 years old we’re still going. Those first few months I was constantly fighting for my right to feed her with people that kept suggesting I stop. 

I had such a strong knowing I wasn’t ready to be done and I finally got to a knowing that I didn’t want to have so much friction in my home with so-called experts that had a different goal than I did. They are wonderful if you want a sleep trained baby. They are not as great when your goal is connection and co-sleeping. Once I got back to knowing things started reorganizing for the better.  

There is a price to pay when you go against who you truly are whether it’s to try to fit in or make things feel simpler—the price can be steep. From being ungrounded, getting injured, feeling scattered or experiencing a bit of chaos before you say enough and choose a new way again. 

Also, when you’re in a state of dysregulation (meaning your flight or fight responses are highly activated), you will often choose the path of least resistance–which are usually outdated patters that feel easiest. For some of you that may be people pleasing and for others that may be overstretching your bandwidth without taking care of yourself. 

Know I’ve caught myself many times wanting to blame others and not fully own my choices when they haven’t worked out as well as they could have. This requires us to dig deeper and expand our being. 

It’s so helpful to connect to who you are as spirit to help shift this pattern. 

When you see, feel or sense something no longer serving you, it’s time to have the courage to make a change. Change is never easy for anyone. 

I was reminded of a quote I find helpful when I need to remember who I am.

“You don’t have a soul. You ARE a soul; you have a body.” C.S. Lewis. 

When we remember the truth about our eternal future, we don’t sweat the small stuff. It’s easier to have patience, to embrace the ups and downs of your journey and times of growth. It’s also easier to release attachments to things being a certain way. 

Remember, you ARE your creator living in your own creations. Even when it doesn’t feel like, I truly believe we co-create each experience as we’re ready for more awareness, flow and expansion. 

Holding that knowing that you are so much bigger than your body or whatever you may be going through can hopefully help expand your perspective and courage. 

How do you feel about your choices lately? 

I invite you to set a timer for 10 minutes to journal and reflect on your past choices and what you want to create moving forward? 

• Do you have more tasks to link to your highest values? 
• What do you want to let go of? 
• Are there past situations where you’re blaming someone…what truths do you need to see to let it go? 
• What do you need to delegate to lean into your inspired actions even more? 
• How can you lean into your most loving, open, soft yet clear version of yourself? 

Lots of love,
Laurin