Do you tend to worry if something will turn out ok? 

Or, if a loved one will be ok? 

Today’s message is about what to do and how to build your trust when you feel concerned, fearful, uncertain and unable to control someone else’s outcome. 

It can be challenging to separate your energy from someone you care about. 

It can also be easy to have expectations, judgements and opinions about how someone should or could live their life, take care of themselves, communicate or show up…and someone else’s growth cycle and actions aren’t in your hands. 

Remember, you can’t and aren’t meant to be in control of everything, no matter how badly you may want to. 

Choosing to focus on your feelings, thoughts, and energy is what you can control and allow space for. 

And, know there may be some worry that comes and goes. Rather than get stuck in it, acknowledge that you care. 

And, then remind yourself of what you can choose and move through within yourself. 

Worry, concern and fear are all opportunities for you to deepen your connection with yourself, your capacity to hold space for your own energy and lovingly hold space for others without merging. 

When something feels heavy, there can also be a tendency to go into overwhelm, fight, freeze or avoidance. 

When that happens you may find yourself disconnecting from friends and family that can be there for you. You want to do it alone and feel like life is getting too heavy, too busy and too out of control for your comfort level. 

This is also an opportunity for a growth cycle for you as well as someone else. 

Know, when you’re triggered by what someone is going through, there is a match of something to assist you in your growth as well.   

The more you harden your inner world thinking it will help you guard or protect yourself from your outer world, the less authentic you will feel. 

Today, I’m offering some journaling questions for you to reflect on. 

Before you dive in, ask yourself: 

How often do you get caught up worrying about someone else? 

How much of your energy is expended focused outside of what you can control? 

There are three ways to shift how you can show up for yourself and be an inspiration for others:

1. Environment. 
   
   • Does your current environment support you holding a high vibration? Think home, work, places you go, people you surround yourself with. 
   • Do you feel permission and allow yourself to be in your light around others? Do you feel comfortable setting healthy boundaries?  
     
2. Feelings & Thoughts. 
   
   • What specifically do you spend time worrying about? 
   • If it relates to someone else, how do you believe this is affecting you? 
   • What specific fears and doubts within yourself could this situation or person bring to the surface if you allow yourself to see it? 

If you reframe your concern as a place to be curious about yourself and grow, you’ll have an easier time seeing what’s present. This isn’t about judgment, criticism or places to feel shame–these are universal patterns. 

We’re all human and feel less than at times. The more comfortable you can be with all of yourself, the more you truly get to know and love yourself. 

3. Actions & Rituals.
   
   • Do you focus your attention and actions on helping someone else to take the focus away from yourself? 
   • Do you practice a level of self-care, reflection and love the way you know would serve you? This can be journaling, meditation, swimming and mindful hobbies…
   • Are you sedentary, or are you moving your body in a way that helps you feel connected and embodied? 

Even though you may not be able to control or change what is going on within someone else or around you, you CAN ALWAYS shift how you relate to any person or circumstance. 

Regardless of what’s going on…you are connected, guided and enough. 

The less judgment and ideals you hold about what should or could be or what’s possible, the more present you will be able to be. It’s when you relate to what’s happening differently, there’s space for a new outcome as well. 

What is something you’ve been focused on that you know could use a reframe and shift of focus??

Love to hear from you.

With love,
Laurin